Meanwhile
in Oklahoma
By
Bonnie
25
September, 2012
Here
in Oklahoma what you have been predicting for some time is here
already, with exception to the full brunt of the collapse. The
grocery still has food, the system is still operating, but we are all
essentially indigent. For example, I am now out of dishwashing liquid
and running low on laundry detergent; they are right there within
walking distance and cost less than six dollars for both, but I
cannot purchase them. But we will find a way... I am bilingual and
educated and skilled in more than one trade, but while visiting
Walmart last month my children and I sat on the bench in the entry
waiting for my husband and someone handed each of my children one
dollar out of pity. I was devastated. We have everything we need.
We're financially poor with no need for vanity. We are educated and
self-sufficient and can make most everything we need, but until the
majority of the population comes down to our level this ability holds
no real value. All it means is that we are already running low on
supplies but have no cash to reacquire them, while others still have
some cash left. And this makes feel lonely.
Our
local financial and political environment is so pathetic that I
barely leave home lest I hang my head in shame among those who refuse
to move themselves beyond denial. To them I am a loser, a worthless
individual because only I am unemployed but I am also
criminal—because despite our education and adaptability, despite
being highly skilled and capable, we cannot afford car insurance. You
see, we have this outlandish requirement that we survive in a
sustainable manner. Were it not for the federally funded Lifeline
service we would have no telephone. Remarkably, I have paid (yes,
actually paid!) for the Lifeline service for five years through four
different phone companies and never had a reliable phone. It finally
got to the point where I can call out but incoming calls do not ring.
And so, I cannot run ads for my skills, I cannot include a phone
number when apply for jobs, or have a doctor contact me, all because
the phone does not work properly. My doctor gave up (rendering my new
Obamacare benefits useless), employers think I am irresponsible
because they cannot call me, and self-employment opportunities are
severely limited for someone without a reliable phone. No amount of
contact with local representatives is able to solve the problem of
making the phone service reliable.
Meanwhile,
there is no money and everything is increasing in price. We don't
need to worry about our lack of car insurance because my husband is
well-established with the local police department. They know; they
understand. We are not any trouble for them, but what if a new cop
were hired, with a different attitude? This can happen at any time,
and the new penalties recently enacted to discourage driving without
insurance digs a deeper hole for us, one impossible to dig out of.
Meanwhile, we must drive where we cannot walk, and the design of the
place is such that most places cannot be reached on foot. New job
opportunities might open up, if only our car were allowed to venture
just outside of town, or if we could actually afford the fuel, the
mandatory auto insurance or an actual working telephone. More
importantly we must purchase gas to mow and trim our lawn. Keeping up
appearances is more important here than anything else. A manicured
lawn is a vane symbol, but it is also a legal requirement that is
important for us. We are terrified of talking to the wrong person at
the wrong time about the wrong things. Even though we are law-abiding
citizens, we could easily become victims of more oppression.
I
don't mean to sound depressing, but this is the reality. In spite of
it, we do very well for ourselves. Occasionally, some neighbors will
admit in private and outside of earshot that they look up to us. Some
profess to envy what seems to them our ability to do as we please,
feeling free of the constraints of this corrupt political and
religious system hell-bent on oppression at every turn. They have to
stretch their minds really hard to comprehend that we use newspaper
in place of toilet paper, or that paper towels having been missing
from our lives for more than five years, replaced by real napkins.
Yet our adaptions are not a question of style but forced upon us by
circumstance and pure necessity. We installed a wood-burning stove to
reduce our enormous electric bill, not realizing we would eventually
have to cook on it too. We are now gathering all the local wood for
future fuel before we are have to compete with the neighbors for any
that is left. Even so, it will become our most valuable asset. All
those tiny twigs that everyone throws away in the trash: we break
down every single one of them for kindling. It's tedious, but also
it's commonsense and a constant reality check, though the now
obsolete “modern” ideas and concepts continue to cloud my mind.
Guilt and, sometimes, self pity rear their ugly heads when I compare
my lifestyle to those nearby, who still lead “normal” lives even
though my tomatoes, compost piles and essential supplies are far more
valuable because of what is coming—for everyone.
Why
is everyone still just babbling about these things? Don't they know
they need to start now? Don't they know, like me, that they should
read your lessons ten times over take careful notes because those
lessons may not be accessible in the future? Don't they realize that
gardening and growing one's own food requires years of practice and
failure? Do they think that someone will provide them with free
training instructions at no cost? Do they to think that reading about
gardening is insufficient for success?
Whatever
it is they think, it is a matter of time before they are bled dry and
forced to join us. The utilities here are three times the national
average. We live in a corrupt municipality that survives off these
outrageous utility bills. It is using this free money to build a
huge, gleaming new building to house the police and fire departments.
The city strong-arms its residents into supporting their pet projects
and pad their paychecks by bundling the utilities with the water (it
is all or nothing) and maintaining zero tolerance for late payments.
If we want to live within our means and not use electricity, we will
have no water. Access to jobs here is controlled by cronyism—not
education or qualifications. I complained about this years ago only
to find unsympathetic ears and suggestions that I was making excuses.
According to them I was not being slighted; I was just lazy. In
truth, I was foreseeing being catapulted into a third world country
and that is exactly what has happened in my area. I secretly look
forward to a time when those same critics struggle to heat their
homes. Will they remember me? Probably not.
“Your
utility rates will necessarily skyrocket,” President Obama said
recently. That hasn't even hit yet! And how will they pay for those
sky-high rates? Only last year did minimum wage workers in Oklahoma
get a raise to $7.50 an hour. Before that they were making $5.50,
$6.50 if they were lucky. One woman working as a maid in a local
nursing home began at $6.00 fifteen years ago, and has since received
only one raise of $0.01 per hour, because she was adamant in asking
for it. She finally got a raise last year to $7.50. Still, she
brought up two children and sent them to college without a supporting
spouse. Oklahoma holds a major advantage: it is already poor. What
may devastate another society may only scratch ours. Some of our
elders have raised their children in shacks with dirt floors and not
having running water until the children were in their teens. But
Oklahoma also has very few financial options, except in the
metropolitan areas. That is to say, we have no cash.
But
apparently it is just not yet time for Oklahomans to come together in
action. Everyone has their own plan or is still in denial. While I
feel alone, it is not because my poverty is an isolated case. I am
lonely because I am one of the few here with a good education, but I
remain indigent. But I will not be alone for much longer: mutual
poverty will break the insecurity threshold that many uneducated
Oklahomans have. I can profess nobility in deciding to prioritize
staying at home with my two young children and abandoning any
miniscule hope of ever paying off my student loans. I will stay under
the radar as an indigent person, so that I can utilize that time to
fully equip my children for survival in whatever world awaits them.
It is difficult enough to teach them the methods; even worse that I
must learn them myself first!
But
even those who know the methods are being challenged by the
destabilizing, rapidly changing climate. Were it not for the imported
trees we would be in the middle of another dust bowl: our January
through July average was the hottest in eighty years, frustrating
even the most experienced and adaptable gardeners. Remember, we have
wicked weather as a normal part of gardening, coupled with an
inconsistent growing season. In spring or early summer, as soon as we
provide makeshift shelters for our tomatoes under a thunderstorm or
tornado watch we have to start covering them up for an unexpected
freeze. These are normal adventures, but we are now forced to include
methods of gardening in extreme drought rather than relying upon the
local water supply. Hugelkultur helps, but it's backbreaking work to
build it without a backhoe. Many are looking to move to more stable
climates. I have no choice but to dig in.
Dmitry,
as depressing as all this sounds I've never been more happy, more
free or more content. I live the dream of actually raising my
children, teaching them myself and providing for their spiritual
needs. I do not need miss one single day of the sparkle in their eye
or the necessary moments of nurture expected of a mother. Their two
older siblings were not so fortunate. If I could do it all again, I
would have remained poor for them too.
Thank
you for your advice and outlook. I am now at peace with my decision
to willingly accept poverty for the rest of my life, in order that my
children may fare better. If I can learn to modify my soil, grow a
garden and live at rock bottom, then anyone can!
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